a day ago
Untitled Art's non-alcoholic beers are sometimes boring, sometimes magic
I like non-alcoholic beer. Well, I like the *idea* of non-alcoholic beer.
Being able to recreate the relaxing ritual of cracking a beer without the concern of a minor hangover or the massive calorie load of a boozy IPA is a wonderful hypothesis. But for too long, non-alcoholic beer all tasted the same -- crisply carbonated but undeniably loaded down with cereal grains that made you feel you were sipping a bowl of Grape-Nuts, not a lager.
That tide has turned in recent years. Breweries, grasping for market share when America is drinking less alcohol than it has since prohibition, have turned to the NA sector for new streams of income. That's meant a rising tide of THC drinks and booze-free beers.
Untitled Art has been kicking around in my fridge since back when it was 3rd Sign -- makers of a pretty good porter but shuttered due to distribution issues. In the years since they've experimented wildly across the spectrum of beers and NA beverages and eventually got bought out by Asahi. Those beers are often hit-or-miss, but they're never boring. Big, sweet dessert stouts and bold IPAs were standouts across the backdrop of contract brewing that's helped Octopi expand to a staple in package stores across the country.
How does that apply to their non-alcoholic beers? Let's see what we've got.
Mango dragonfruit sour: A
I'm drinking this one the way God intended. After thoroughly exhausting myself inflating a raft at my daughter's pool. An extremely Dad scenario deserves an extremely Dad beer, and an NA fruited sour? That'll do.
Cracking the can unleashes a wave of fruity slightly tangy aromas backed by just a little bit of lactic acid. The first sip is dense complex and rewarding. The dragon fruit is tangy; slightly sour but sweet enough to remain balanced. The hint of bile that you get from some of the worst sours out there is nowhere to be found, relieving me of my greatest fear.
That bit of lactic acid in the slightly denser texture makes us feel more like a milkshake beer than many milkshake IPAs. What you get is a dense, surprisingly low calorie beer. Well, not a beer but, you know, something close to it.
It clocks in at 90 calories, which is about 60 percent of a soda or a regular beer. At that value. You're getting a lot of flavor at a light beer's toll on your gut. That's a solid trade.
The downside is it's not quite a hoppy refresher in the way a hop water or a light beer are. It's dense. It's more of a sipper and it's probably not the first thing I should have grabbed after modestly strenuous activity. That said, I am enjoying the hell out of it.
All in all, it's not what I expected in a good way. It's not quite a sour and not quite a traditional NA beer. Instead, it is its own thing. And that's great.
West Coast IPA: B+
The smell off the top is hoppy, with just enough of a stale malt lingering in the background to remind you this is a non-alcoholic beer. The first sip is sharp and refreshing. The bitterness of those hops is up front, but not overwhelming. You get a little of that malt and a crisp, dry finish that leaves you wanting more.
That helps cover that traditional NA taste. It's still there, but it's minimal thanks to that beefy, but not tongue-scorching, hop cover. It's still undeniably a booze-free beer, but it's packing a lot of flavor beyond that. It's satisfying in a way similar beers are not.
The downside is it's not as special as the dragonfruit sour. It's great for a non-alcoholic beer, but it's still operating within those parameters while the sour felt like something new entirely. The result is refreshing and capable of fulfilling the ritual of a full strength beer.
Juicy IPA: B-
Here's an interesting combination. Will the fruit of a juicy IPA be able to cover up the NA scent and taste so familiar with the genre? It worked wonders with the dragonfruit sour and I have some high hopes here.
Cracking the can, however, unleashes a wave of non-alcoholic beer smells. There aren't a lot of fruit or hops involved spilling out of the aluminum. It's malt all the way.
The first sip is crisper and more refreshing than I expected. It's not especially fruity or hoppy. It feels a little bit more like a lager than a pale ale.
However, it's crisp. The carbonation is on point and that NA taste that you'd expect from the smell coming off the top doesn't overpower you. It's still very much a non-alcoholic beer, but it's not as egregious as some of the others in the category.
Still, it feels like it's missing the mark as a pale ale. You get a hint of citrus toward the end of each sip, which is nice. But you don't really get any of the hops. There's nothing here to bring you back. It feels more like a Blue Moon or a Shock Top -- more forgettable than a big bold juicy IPA you would get from a local brewery.
Italian Style Pils: B
I'm a little bit hesitant with this one. Italian beers, at least the big ones you find out here, are fairly minimal when it comes to hops or other flavors that could wash over the signature taste of non-alcoholic brews. They're crisp and sharp and other adjectives that stand in for refreshing-but-not-quite-easy-drinking.
This pours with a lovely, lacy head that dies down to a lingering quarter inch after a minute. The smell off the top is grain and just a bit of hops. That grain is half the Grape-Nut cereal malt that dominates NA beers and half something sunnier. There's a certain brightness involved that, if nothing else, does raise it higher than similar booze-less brews.
That battle carries on in the first sip. It's undoubtedly an NA beer, but it's also sweet and crisp. That gives way to a pleasant aftertaste that lands in the middle. Malty, effervescent and with juuuuust a little citrus involved to make everything a bit more complex.
These powers combine to make it refreshing and poundable. It's a great warm weather beer, though it holds up well enough regardless of climate.
Chocolate Dark Brew: A
First thing first: this smells incredible. Cracking the can unleashes a wave of rich chocolate like you just unwrapped one of those $6 bars of cacao. It smells like a fresh mug of hot chocolate. A really nice start.
The first sip is thinner than expected. The carbonation is crisp, and while this is heavier than a lager it's about the same mouthfeel as, say, a big juicy IPA. You get that chocolate flavor, but also some roasted porter notes as well. You go from sweet up front to malty before a crisp, not-quite-dry-but-close finish.
It's great. What's even better is the lack of NA cereal vibes coming from it. This tastes like a full-fledged chocolate porter. Maybe not a heavy, eight percent beer, but a lighter version. If you put this in a lineup of six similar, full ABV beers and asked me to pick out the impostor I might still land on it, but that's no guarantee. This sounds like faint praise, but almost anyone who's had a bunch of NA beers knows that distinct taste and how it stands out from your regular sip.
Not this Dark Brew. It's sweet and crisp and a little complex. Untitled Art went for a dessert beer and wound up making something that would be just about perfect for a fireside fall night. Even without the alcohol.
Oktoberfest: B
Let's finish with my favorite beer style. Marzens, festbiers, anything that's a malt bomb is gonna be an easy win for me. Can Untitled Art balance those toasty, crisp and refreshing flavors with the inherent cereal-ness of a non-alcoholic beer?
It pours with a fluffy white head. It smells mostly like the real thing, though a sweet, Grape-Nut tinge settles in toward the end. While the sweetness carries through on your tongue, that NA taste is minimal. The feeling you get here is Munich-adjacent malt. It's a bit thin and definitely too sugary, but it's not a typical non-alcoholic brew.
That leaves it in a weird spot, but kind of a logical one. Untitled Art's best NA beers are sweet -- the sour and the chocolate dark. That sweetness again crops up to mitigate the feel you're drinking a beer with less than 0.5 percent alcohol by volume. That doesn't jive with your typical marzen, it does sorta work here. While I miss the crisp finish of those beers, this is unique, interesting and refreshing.
On the other hand, I can put down a liter of Lowenbrau without issue. This? This would be much more difficult. Still, it doesn't taste like NA beer. That's a win.
Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's?
This a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I'm drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That's the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm's. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink Untitled Art's non-alcoholic beers over a cold can of Hamm's?
The sour and the chocolate dark are good enough to be sipped regardless of alcohol content. The others helpful recreate the ritual of cracking a beer. All in all, it's a solid lineup so, yes.
This is part of FTW's Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.
This article originally appeared on For The Win: Untitled Art's non-alcoholic beers are sometimes boring, sometimes magic
